Gurb turned me on to a kick-ass book called “The Mysterious Case Of Rudolph Diesel,” and I think you should read it if you’re interested at all in the world, but you should buy it with cash in a town you don’t live in and read it in a dimly lit cavern. Because if you don’t, if The System finds out you read a book about a fascinating historical character and his mysterious disappearance, you’ll be clocked immediately by their tendrils as… whoever this is.
Some of the book titles themselves are almost beyond parody. The world has become so ridiculous, and the naming conventions of this space so performative and idiotic, that you really gotta sit down and have a think about it. Until Amazon tried to sell me a book by him, indeed several, I had no idea Bill O’Reilly was still real. Let me be clear: all have sinned and come short of the glory of God. To constantly harp on somebody’s failures is to invite swift sanction from the universe vis a vis your own less than stellar performance – but this guy actually sux IRL. He’s so unable to stop literally grunting at women like a hog and calling women employed by him on the phone to make sexual entreaties and offering jobs to women which he then rescinds because they won’t go up to his fucking hotel room that his employer had to cut more than one multimillion dollar hush money check. He ain’t the moral arbiter of shit, and it’s hard to imagine going to him for any kind of information unless it’s information about how to make hog sounds. Satan is sharpening up a wicked implement for him that we don’t even have a name for and Bill is desperate to avoid it. At this point, we should be looking for Bill O’Reilly’s phylactery. Hey man, I can’t just be hangin’ out with you here in the post all day. I gotta go to a boardgame convention! It’s called “Penny Arcade Expo Unplugged,” but I think we should just shorten the first part to just “PAX.” Anyway, if you’re in Philly or close by, you can definitely still go. Three day badges are all gone, but all the single days are there, and there’s a thirteen dollar Sunday badge exclusively for your writhing larvae. We even have molting areas here on premises
(CW)TB out.
